Yesterday, at age 7, my daughter learned that Santa Claus is not real. Her dad and I broke it to her as gently as we could. We were met with a blank stare and an unsure smile at first. Later, I tried to joke around with my kid and tell her about how I scoured SM for a snowy owl stuffed toy last year with her in tow. How I was able to have it wrapped twice so she wouldn't know it was for her and how fulfilling it was to see her eyes light up when she saw Hedwig in her stocking.
It was as much a painful time as it was for me, but my ever-leftbrained husband told me that we were doing her a disservice if we didn't reveal that the fat jolly old man who comes down the chimney (or in our case, through the back door) does not exist. What convinced me was the thought of having my daughter laughed at when she boasts of Santa giving her a set of Nancy Drew Notebooks just like she'd requested. At least, we were the ones who told her, unlike this article about how a teacher informed her students about how Santa Claus does not exist through a worksheet.
So now I'm torn about what to tell my second child. Should I still tell her about Santa Claus? Is letting your kid believe in Santa Claus deceiving her?
Last night I asked my daughter how she feels about Santa Claus not being real. She said it's okay and then whispered, "Can I still write to him even if I know he's not real?" My feelings of apprehension were somehow quieted.
How about you? Do you let your children believe in Santa?
3 comments:
I was in grade 5 (11 years old!) when I finally learned and accepted that Santa Claus is not real. Though I felt saddened by the fact that it somehow ushered in the end of my childhood as I knew it, I also appreciated the fact that I got to enjoy him while I still could. I was thankful that I have parents who wanted me to believe in magic and Father Christmas and elves and reindeer. My Tita Jean used to tell me stories that when she opened the door to the roof top she even bumped into Santa Claus himself! He was there daw to deliver my gifts! :D Those are some of my best childhood memories. And even though they were proven to be false, I still smile and feel happy when I remember them. :) Besides, when I finally knew about it, I was already mature enough to handle the truth :) And yes, until now I still do believe in faeries. :)
I believe Santa represents valuable lessons/moments from our childhood: anticipation, surprise, expectation, and down the line, learning about life's realities. We all knew about Santa and went through the cycle, and I reckon, we turned out fine :) I don't have kids, but in the event of, for sure I shall let them go through the experience :) (Same goes for all those non-PC fairy tales!)
@krissy, my BFF and I used to spend most of our recess time keeping watch over a hole in an Acacia tree back during elementary school days. We firmly believed that fairies lived there and would staunchly defend ourselves from "teasing" classmates who said we were crazy. Those memories are priceless to me.
@Mariel... I spent all of Christmas Eve mourning over the loss of Santa Claus and didn't enjoy Christmas morning as much too. I think having Santa Claus in our lives is very important as much for me as my daughters. I plan on keeping up the tradition with my next daughter, regardless of what my husband says. It's funner that way. (See? That word truly encompasses the feeling; I don't see why that former boss of yours didn't see the potential in that word.)
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